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Dedicated to
Patty, Daniel, Kelsey, Marissa and Joseph - my inspiration;
Richard, Marti, Bill and Theresa - my admiration;
and adoptive families everywhere - my celebration.

(This is the Way it was) "Meant to Be"

Words & Music by Daniel J. Paolini

When I found out you were all alone,
no one to call your own,
waiting for love so patiently.
I said I would pay any price,
make any kind of sacrifice,
so we could be together for eternity.

Do you need me, like I need you?
There's nothing in this world I would not do;
to show to you, to make you see,
this is the way it was meant to be.

I did not know what I should do,
to reach out and connect with you.
so I prayed that God would guide and help me see.
I was wond'ring if it worked at all,
when I got that telephone call.
and I knew that you would soon be here with me.

You found me, and I found you.
I guess what they say is really true;
that I found you, and you found me.
This is the way it was meant to be.

I would wait a thousand years.
I would go a million miles.
Just so I could dry your tears,
and see your wondrous smile.

When you reached out and you took my hand,
it was hard for me to understand.
How anyone could ever let you go.
For the feeling I have in my heart,
makes me sure that we will never part.
With joy like this I want the world to know.

That you love me, and I love you.
I guess what they say is really true;
that I love you, and you love me.
This is the way it was meant to be.

You have me, and I have you.
The thread of our lives is finally in view.
So I have you, and you have me.
This is the way it was meant to be.
This is the way it was meant to be.

Copyright © 2000 - Daniel J. Paolini - All Rights Reserved

Genesis

This song was inspired by discussions about the "Red Thread" on the China adoption support mailing list, A-Parents-China on OneList.com.

The Red Thread philosophy is that people who are destined to meet are connected by a red thread. It may stretch and twist, but it will never break.

The Red Thread is not as much about predestination as it is about the blessed ties that bind us.

While not everyone agrees, I believe it captures the essense of adoption, particularly international or transracial adoption.

Analysis

The song never makes any explicit reference to adoption. In this sense, it could be just another love story.

From an adoption perspective, however, the words came easily. In the first verse, we discover that there is a child out there we believe was meant for us, although the child might not yet know it. We make the commitment to do what it takes to be together.

The second verse captures the uncertainty of the process and the lack of control we often feel during the "paper chase". The string counterpoint tries to reflect this, as it sounds "out of sync" with the melody until resolving when we get the referral.

The bridge symbolizes the wait between referral and travel. It appears to speed up (perhaps it is the beating of our hearts?) yet we aren't really moving any faster. It still seems like it will take forever, and even appears to slow down until...

The dramatic key change symbolizes the impact of that moment when we first meet! The strings soar as a metaphor for how we feel.

The accompaniment for the repeated final chorus, on the other hand is scaled back. It symbolizes a more personal experience of bonding between the new family members.

The arrangement concludes with a snippet from "Oh, How Happy You Have Made Me", a Sixties song from Shades of Blue (just because I wanted it to!).

Lyric Version Notes

Originally, the third line was "Hoping for love so desperately". I decided that this was too bleak for a song about what was "meant to be"; hence "waiting for love so patiently."

"So we could be..." replaced "To be..." in the sixth line to more closely match the meter of the second and third verses.

In the third verse, the third line was changed from "Why anyone would..." to "How anyone could...". The first was accusatory; the second better reflects some empathy for the difficult decision that faced the parent(s).

The final repeated chorus was changed to make it more personal, and to finally squeeze in one oblique reference to the "Red Thread"!